self-proclaimed fence-sitter

Well, here I am at the friendly local Argo Tea near Michigan Avenue. They have good tea, and it's a place away from my own apartment where I am less likely to get homework done because of how easily I get distracted at home. Although Starbucks has comfier chairs. I would go to Starbucks for that fact, but I have to pay for their wireless internet, which I need for my online workbooks. So free internet wins over comfy butt-spot. Not that I'm all that less distracted, anyway. Oh well.

Small update: class is slighty annoying but fine, the new bookkeeping tasks at work are slightly mind-numbing because of all the numbers but is fine, the men at work are beginning to cross the line when it comes to thinking with the wrong head and I may have to deal with issues, still reading C.S. Lewis and going to church and liking it, need to actually do some laundry, and pulled out the crockpot for the first time this fall last night.


To the topic at hand. I am a fence-sitter. I always have been. I decided to actually think about this, rather than just say something that sounds correct and insightful.

It is tactful, to say the least. If you are able to see both sides of a situation, you are less likely to be so set in your ways that you are unwilling to change. It is important to be willing to change and grow, for numerous reasons. It is easier to get along with all kinds of people if you are willing to see all sides of the story. You're also less likely to piss people off.

Or to be liked by everyone.

Yeah, I know that's been my reason. I just want people to like me. So I make sure my values and thoughts are maleable enough that I don't have to worry about someone not liking my values and thoughts, and I'm more likely to be liked. I am a social chameleon, able to change to fit into any situation. There are pros to this ability.

But there are also cons. I am less myself than I'd like to be. I try not to harbor strong opinions, for fear that someone might be offended. And I'm so afraid of people saying that I'm wrong.

Oh, and look -- I'm now kinda fence-sitting about my state as a fence-sitter. [sigh] Nice.

From now on, I am myself. I do not unnecessarily bend for others' opinions. I am willing to change, but I am willing to state my opinion. Maybe less people will like me. Fine. Maybe more people will like me. Fine. I preach about being true to myself, but I don't do a good job of actually doing anything sometimes. Maybe I'll remember this time.

I don't think this was actually in response to anything -- just some new, crazy insight of mine. You know, that I'm insightful without doing a damn thing about the insight.


Grow on, everyone.