Halloween should be a National Holiday.

...because, let me tell you... I think it deserves to be a national holiday. And I could really use a vacation right now.


I work at a costume shop. It's a good one, and I enjoy it there. However, the Saturday of the Big Halloween Weekend always blows if you work at a costume shop. I enjoy sewing, and costumes and all... but really. If I can give one piece of advice to anyone, it would be to

NEVER GO TO A COSTUME/HALLOWEEN STORE THE SATURDAY OF HALLOWEEN.

Really. Never. It is not worth your time. It's like trying to rent a Santa suit at 10 am Christmas Eve day. ...Okay, so maybe that's a bad comparison. Let's try this one: as bad as trying to get a rush order of Oil-Rubbed Bronze Schlage doorknobs during Parade of Homes season. ...No? Well... it's just really bad. Don't do it.


So yes, I worked. And I was sewing late at night. I was making my halloween costume -- 19th century undergarments. That includes a corset. Ever know anyone (besides me) who has made a corset -- the real kind with metal stays and everything? No? There's a reason. They suck to make.

NEVER TRY TO MAKE A CORSET.

That's also some good advice. At least I only broke two of my sewing machine needles.


So I was lacking my sleep already. I'm an eight-hours-a-night kinda girl, so this lack of sleep was detrimental to my brain power. Then I had to go to some parties. Yes -- had to, thank you very much. One was a costume party -- and if you think I'm not going to a costume party on Halloween, you don't know me very well. The other party was my own... but not a costume party. My roommate hates costumes. I'm not sure how long our roommate situation will work out under these circumstances, but I think we'll be able to work through our differences over time.

NEVER HAVE A HALLOWEEN PARTY THAT DOESN"T INVOLVE COSTUMES.

Okay... so that's not really advice. It's just my crazed, highly biased opinion. But costumes *are* fun. And that's a fact.

Fooled you!

Okay. So, I could say something like, "Of course I knew that site was a joke, I just wanted to see what you all thought of it."


But I'd be lying. I had no idea until Mary told me that the site she sent me was a joke. I should have known. But I didn't.

My dignity has been lowered signifigantly. I suppose, with time, I will bounce back.

But I still think the FDA and the USDA are run by big business.

And the beef and dairy boards give a lot of money to them so we won't say anything bad.

So there.


But just think... the government could be worse than it already is...

Eat Well!

Okay, so I'm NOT a fan of the web site that I've just been to. And yes, I can be crazy with my healthy habits, and I have my conspiracy theories that the FDA and USDA are funded by big business, but really ... there is no reason anyone should be allowed to read and believe some of this information.

Here is some the great wisdom found on My Pyramid (when you go there, submit your stats for your plan on the right side of the page):


"Make half your grains highly refined (or "processed"). Highly refined grains ease the digestion process by bypassing the pesky nutrient and fiber absorption step."

What? Don't eat fiber? Oh, that's a good idea. Not to mention that refined food is SO nutritious.


"Individually packaged vegetable items from exotic places around the globe are cleaner, more convenient, and keep our friends in the petroleum and petrochemical industries chugging along."

Individually packaged -- good for creating more trash. And let's all use more petroleum, shall we?


"While fruits may be eaten whole, buying canned, frozen or otherwise packaged fruit helps ensure the sterility of the fruit. Some fruits can be rather tart or tangy, so a smart way to make these more appealing to children is to select products with added sweetners."

Yeah, I can't tell you how many times I've had problems with my whole, raw apples not being sterile. And we all know children should have more sugar in their diets.


"Drink milk for healthy bones and teeth! Some "scientific studies" have claimed milk has no connection to healthy bone development. These studies, however, ignore the most obvious correlation - bones, teeth and milk are all white."

Anyone who knows me understands that I don't like pushing my semi-vegan and anti-dairy ideals on others. But *this* is good reasoning: because milk is a certain color, it's good for other parts of the body that are the same color. Is poo good for your hair if you're a brunette?


"Liver and other organ meats are high in cholesterol. Just so you know. But who eats those creepy parts anyways, right?"

Okay, I'm not a huge fan of those particular cuts of meat, either. But as far as I know, they are fairly healthy. And what about the people who eat them all the time? Let's call them creepy, too, while we're at it.


Okay. Am I really out-of-bounds here? I mean, really. I just don't get it. I'm speechless. (Well, almost.)

They like me... they really like me... [sigh, tear]

So guess who has a job!


Um, that would be me. I have a job. *And* they even wanted me back this week. I think I found a winner.


And so have they. tee-hee. [she smiles a smile, the kind that twinkles on the second tooth]

So I'm working for an IT security consulting company. Yeah, I know... not exactly the field I planned on joining. But the people are great. I'm making money. I can wear jeans or a fancy-scmancy skirt to the office. Really, life is pretty good.

Oh, and the CEO said he liked me so much, he didn't even care to see my resume or find out if I had ever been to college.


I wonder if I can call my school and get my money back?